The Brene Brown Ted Talk is a must see for Creatives. Writers, artists and creative types are some of the most vulnerable people I know. To put yourself out there, to risk criticism about your work and dare to create in a culture that doesn’t always value creativity, is hard. But despite this predicament, Brene Brown ( a very left brain scientist/social worker/researcher) believes that this vulnerability may hold the key to deep, soulful living. Recently, she gave a 20 minute TED talk on The Power of Vulnerability that I think is compelling and courageous for someone in her field. This was part of her appeal for me. Her conclusions are something you would expect from artists and poets, not people who come to the conclusion through documented, left-brained research. The link is here if you have twenty minutes to spare in order to watch.
She says on her website:
When I stand back and look at the work I’ve done over the past ten years, I can clearly see that the heart of my work is about the very human need to live with authenticity, love and belonging, and a resilient spirit. I call this WholeHearted living. I have dedicated my career to studying difficult topics like shame, empathy, and vulnerability because I want to know, in my head and in my heart, why we’re all so afraid to let our true selves be seen and known. I want to hear and tell the stories that inspire us to be real, imperfect, and powerful. The core of WholeHearted living is connection.
And then later:
I recently wrote a piece on my blog about my journey to live authentically and soulfully. I received several emails asking me what I meant by living authentically and soulfully. For me, the soulful piece is about living in the spirited space that connects my head and my heart (which is a huge challenge for a head person, like me). Trying to come up with a definition for authenticity forced me to tap deep into my research to find the words that capture what I’ve learned in my work and reflects what I’ve actually lived. Here’s what I came up with:
What about you? Tell me what you thought about the Brene Brown Ted Talk. Would your life look any differently if you chose to live it authentically and soulfully? How would this effect your writing, art, and creativity? As always, I’d love to hear from you.
P.S. I am an ex-shrink who writes novels. Check out my books here.
I don’t know what “living authentically” means and I wonder if the author does either. But I sure do know I have doubts. Every day. I wonder why anyone cares about what I am writing. To be honest, sometimes I go to bookstores and look at what other authors are putting out and wonder the same thing.
Then it passes.
Then it returns.
I think searching is a good thing for a creative person to be. My favorites (Kundera, Mahler, Coltrane, Beethoven, Rembrandt) are searchers. But as for living “authentically,” and “embracing who we are” and all that other soft-edged talk, I don’t think we can really discuss it sensibly till we define it. And so far, except for vague platitudes, no one’s done that.
I appreciate your input, John, as always. I think the “soft-edged talk” is there to test the waters. I think to talk about “soul” these days is a dangerous thing, just like talking about “beauty” is. We’ve become so superficial as a culture, I think people who are wise to such things either stay hidden or send up test balloons. I’m glad Brene Brown had the guts to send up a test balloon.
This reminds me of what one of my intellectual heroes, Milan Kundera, is talking about when he discusses “kitch,” and his aversion to it. Kitch is sentimental and by extension simplistic thinking, and a lot of the New Age “Spirituality” and “Beauty” stuff falls into this category. So often people use terms without really thinking about what they mean. Times of bereavement are particularly bad for this: ever rifle through sympathy cards at a store, looking for JUST ONE that said something with a little bit of meaning? That’s what Kundera is talking about.
A great mind. Reading one of his books, fiction or non-, will change your way of seeing things more than pretty much anything out there by these happy-happy gurus of today, even though they are more famous and richer.
From one of my lovely email subscribers:
“Hi Susan,
Enjoyed Ms. Brown’s talk, and agree with it. I particularly like the idea that one must feel worthy within, first. I have believed this for years. There truly is empowerment in knowing and accepting and loving who we really are. Two of my favourite sayings are, ” the only opinion of you that really matters, is the one you have of yourself,” and “know what makes your heart sing, and then do it.” Life is not a dress rehearsal, so….go for it !!”
I’m a Buddhist, and I’d say the heart of my practice is accepting things the way they are. For me, that’s pretty much what Brene Brown is describing as vulnerability. You look inside (or outside) and say, “This is what it is, and I accept it, and it’s okay.”
As for how this outlook affects my writing, I find myself purposefully rejecting acceptance for my characters. With acceptance, there’s basically no drama, and stories need drama. The manuscript I finished last spring was started six years ago, then I had a couple of kids and took a five year break from writing it. During that five year break, I experienced a lot of internal growth, and when I felt like I had the time to go back to it, as I re-read what I’d already written (approximately half of the book), I noticed my main character making all these bad and/or inexperienced choices. For a second, I thought about changing them, but then I realized how lucky I was that I’d started it when I did. All those bad choices are really what made the character interesting. It was very eye-opening.
So I’m all for acceptance/being open to vulnerability for real people, but for characters in a novel, well, not so much, except perhaps at the very end – providing there won’t be a sequel!
Important P.S.
What I forgot to add to the article until later is that Brene Brown is a very left brain scientist/social worker/researcher. This was part of her appeal for me – it’s not who I would expect from someone in her career. You expect these kinds of things from artists, not people who come to the conclusion through documented, left-brained research.
Thanks, Sonja, for your thoughtful comments, as ever. I have Buddhist friends who seem to be more at peace with paradox and “what is.” I’ve never thought of that as accepting their/our vulnerability.
Very interesting what you said about characters, too. I think you’re on to something! Also congratulations on the two kids and coming back to writing after a break! Sounds like something “Scout” would do. 🙂